Which type of iPhone user are you?

As everyone looks forward to the launch of iPhone on Verizon, as it was only available through AT&T before, let’s look back at the iPhone impact on our lifestyles. Upon such reflection, we realize that since the first appearance of iPhone, several types of its customers have emerged.

The Fanboy

 excited about everything that has the Apple logo. He owns every previous versions of iPhone and posts on every forum concerning Apple. Wearing an Apple T-shirt, bought from a former disgruntled Genius Bartechnician and avoids laundering it in order to prevent it from fading. When facing a problem, he blames everything on AT&T and is fully prepared to scapegoat Verizon as well, coming in February.

The Unappreciative

This particular iPhone owner got the iPhone just because it was trendy and on sale when she renewed her AT&T contact. She is not fully aware of the raw computing capability in her hand, and probably doesn’t care anyway.The unappreciative has never downloaded an app, doesn’t use a case and complains about how big the phone is. She misses her Motorola Razr.

The Overuser

Unlike the Unappreciative, the Overuser uses his phone to get the full extent possible. In fact he is always on it, to the degree that it is difficult to hold a conversation with him. He dropped 50$ on a bulky, toilet-proof case, and downloads apps out of sheer boredom.

HE even dressed up as Angry Birds on Halloween.

The Desk Job

This guy owns a Blackberry as well, from which he simply can’t cut the cord. He carries both phones around with him and mainly uses iPhone as a sweaty, glorified iPod at the gym. His corporate job pays for the phone plan, so extra 100$ a month for a phone he never makes calls on doesn’t phase him, (which drives The Fanboy nuts) Optional: walks around with in-ear Bluetooth.

The Hacker

The Hacker can’t be constrained by things like “Terms of Service” or “the FCC”. She jailbroke her iPhone the day she got it and uses it to do things like remote start her canard turn her neighbors’ TV on and off from across the street. She cut off AT&T long ago and makes free calls from Skype via WiFi instead of using a phone plan. She tries to convince The Fanboy to jailbreak as well so he can tether to his laptop, but he is too scared to do this.

The senior Citizen

No one is really sure on how this guy ended up with an iPhone. He has to hold it really far away from his face to use it, and types at 1WPM. You wonder why this guy has his cell phone in the first place and especially cringe when you hear the default iPhone ringing tone play ceaselessly from his jacket pocket while he tinkers with his hearing aid.

The Complainer

This guy does nothing but whine about the iPhone, from the touch keyboard to censorship, to Steve Job’s sweaters. He tells people he’s getting an Android as soon as his contract is up, and gets mad when he sees the Senior Citizen using it incorrectly.

But he is probably getting to get the next iPhone anyway. 

So, confess now, which type of  iPhone user are you?